Let’s all hope Cher doesn’t leave the country. The chanteuse said she would if Trump were elected, but that is a tragedy of a mockery of a sham, to quote Woody Allen. We need Cher right here in the USA. I forget the reason why, but there is one.
Madonna can leave if she wants. It’s reported she’s cursing a lot after absorbing the election results. You would think the Material Girl would like President Trump because he’s a material guy. But no. She looks askance at him and that’s not easy when you’re botoxed up.
Taylor Swift can’t leave. What would the Kansas City Chiefs do? And where would Taylor go? Yes, you are correct — anywhere she wants.
Same with Oprah. I passed by her house in Turks and Caicos and nobody in the swanky neighborhood had ever seen her. Very nice house. She could go there.
The Obamas have to stay in the USA. Too complicated to split. Big Hawaii property, really nice Martha’s Vineyard spread, mini-mansion in D.C., something in Chicago. Not bad for the hope and change couple. Maybe they meant change addresses. I don’t know.
Joe Biden can’t leave either. He would never be able to find his way back. Jill and Hunter could depart, but they won’t. They will recede from public view. In fact, the last time we heard from Jill Biden was after the June debate when she vowed the Bidens would stay in the White House until the Twelfth of Never. But now it’s back to Delaware for the first couple. There are worse places.
Give me a moment.
A jest for you sensitive folks in Wilmington.
Finally, Vice President Harris is not returning to her middle-class home. She’s alighting to her lavish spread in Brentwood, Calif. where O.J. Simpson once lived. No way Kamala is going anywhere except the lecture circuit, where she’ll get around $250,000 to not answer questions. Life can be sweet even in defeat. Yes, that rhymes. What’s it to you?
I may have to leave because there are only so many years in a person’s life. I hope I’m going to heaven, but that is no lock. The nuns warned me, but I didn’t listen. They said if I were snippy to people like Cher and Oprah, there would be a price to pay. Hopefully, the deity has a sense of humor.
And maybe a MAGA hat.