So, where were we when we last left Whoopi Goldberg?
To the best of my recollection, the last time the first-among-equals on the ABC flibbertigibbet-fest “The View” had made news by pronouncing her test for presidential fitness in the wake of Joe Biden’s disastrous debate performance, as she’d taken the intervening week off. TL;DR: As long as he was fit for the job, he was fine.
Her standards of fitness may differ from yours, however, since she said she didn’t care if he accidentally soiled his pants or couldn’t put together a sentence.
Literally.
And not Joe Biden “literally,” as in “figuratively, but in bold 20-pt. font,” but literally literally.
Trending:
Whoopi: “I don’t care if [Biden] pooped his pants. I don’t care if he can’t put a sentence together. Show me he can’t do the job, and then I’ll say, okay, maybe it’s time to go…I have poopy day all the time. All the time.” pic.twitter.com/QlMHzH8LF9
— Nicholas Fondacaro (@NickFondacaro) July 8, 2024
So, verbal incoherence and fecal incontinence: no problemo. Donald Trump’s granddaughter humanizing the GOP nominee at the Republican National Convention in Milwaukee? Hold it right there — time for a freakout!
Kai Trump, the daughter of Donald Trump Jr. and his ex-wife, Vanessa Haydon, took to the stage on the third night of the convention to give a speech that was one of the high points of the night.
Did you like Kai Trump’s speech?
“The media makes my grandpa seem like a different person, but I know him for who he is. He’s very caring and loving. He truly wants the best for this country,” the 17-year-old Kai said.
“He gives us candy and soda when our parents are not looking,” she said. “He always wants to know how we’re doing in school. When I made the high honor roll, he printed it out to show his friends how proud he was of me.”
She also mentioned the pall that still hangs over the American body politic: the attempted assassination of Trump in Butler, Pennsylvania, on Saturday that wounded the former president in the ear and killed one audience member.
“A lot of people have put my grandpa through hell, and he’s still standing,” the teenager said to cheers from delegates.
“Grandpa, you are such an inspiration, and I love you.”
As a father, I could not be more proud of my daughter Kai and the amazing job she did last night. She reached out to me on Monday morning and simply said she feels very strongly that she wants to talk about her grandfather at the RNC and she nailed it! pic.twitter.com/8QXiPO4jlu
— Donald Trump Jr. (@DonaldJTrumpJr) July 18, 2024
So, incoherence and incontinence don’t really register with Whoopi, but this touched a nerve.
“Now, for me, I have a lot of faith in the American people,” Goldberg said during Thursday morning’s show.
“And I know his grandchild was up on the thing and they’re trying to humanize him and change your idea about who this guy is,” she said.
“Don’t fall for that!” she exclaimed.
Yes, whatever you do, don’t humanize someone who has constantly been referred to as subhuman and a threat to democracy. People might start realizing that he’s a hazard to the country and try to stop him by any means necessary, including what happened on Saturday.
Whoopi has now officially exited the orbit of reality.
The real threat to the nation — a president who is physically and mentally unfit for the task on an organic, not perceived, level, and whose condition has been assiduously hidden from the American people by a phalanx of aides and apparatchiks — is perfectly fine, even if he soils his pants or mumbles words no one can understand because they were not put together in an order where they could be understood.
But humanizing a human being who just survived an assassination attempt and is his party’s nominee for the presidency — and also presents none of these problems?
Well, that’s just going too far.
